Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
My grandmass entire neighborhood is over for dessert and i'm high as fuck...about to make a couple of freshman boys real uncomfortable
Freshman in high school? Just your type
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
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