im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
My manager caught me going taking a nap in an empty room. Apparently she sleeps there too.
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
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