What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
Randomize