i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
From scraping the remnants from a coke bag at a lingerie party to meeting with an 80 year old man to discuss civil rights all in under 12 hours bizarrely feels like the epitome of my life
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
I need vodka and champagne for my new favorite drink, vodkapagne. Alternative spellings are "vodkapain" and "vom-machine"
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
Randomize
