He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
What if for Halloween I paint my self gold and make sandwiches for everyone? I'd be a trophy wife! Get it?
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Just got an x-ray done of my hip and you can clearly see the outline of my penis in it. When the doctor saw it she said "wow I haven't seen one that big on an x-ray before." Pretty sure the doc and the nurses are going to be talking about me on their lunch break.
Randomize
