There was this creepy guy on the bus. So I puffed out my stomach & began so hold my stomach like I was preggers.
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
i have a girlfriend
if you're drunk do you have a girlfriend?
no
25 Men Confess The Moment They Knew They Wanted To Marry Their Wife
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
Just puked in the monkey exhibit at the zoo. They ate it. I don't want a pet monkey anymore.
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
You Wouldn’t Guess That These 25 Celebrities Are Complete A**holes
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
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