hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize
