Kiss
Puke
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
it's great music for shaving your balls
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
Just promise me we won't die tonight. I can't have an autopsy report that reads "stomach contents: Tequila and semen."
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
One minute we were playing beer pong, and the next minute I was sprinting to my apartment with a watermelon. wtf happened in between?
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
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