therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
I'm going to kill the bastard that switches my hot hookups from the previous night with ugly chicks
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
Well sundance is in town and Im going to use my one and only shot to bang Taylor swift... Does it count as a random if shes famous?
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
...and if you can get the necessary ingredients to make the Buffalo Chicken Melt, I will latch forever at your Teat of Justice.
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
Randomize
