How drunk are you??
I'm flawless.
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
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He asked if I wanted to blow his flute? Please call me and pretend there is a family emergency!!!
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
then he tried to convert me to islam
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
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Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
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