he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
I'm pretty sure the cop knew you were drunk when you tried to light your cigg with a chapstick.
Randomize
