Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
Randomize
