look no pants
party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently, banging my bartender ex-girlfriend = free drinks again. Not every bad decision is a wrong decision.
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
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