I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
he said i was chugging vodka in the parking lot, gave my # to a married man, started a food fight, and passed out at the bar. how could he NOT consider that a good first date???
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
I should start an etsy shop with all the jewelry and clothes women leave at my house
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
Randomize
