therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
I seem to have left my pride at pride
Upon hearing of his newfound access to every orifice... even ones he just made up... the Grinch's penis grew three sizes that day.
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
can't remember last night but the beers were $3.50, so i can count how many I had by counting my quarters
i can afford to take several trips up and down the parkway right now if I wasn't still hanging over my toilet
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
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