The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
