And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
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yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
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Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
I just licked a piece of cheese off my phone screen if that makes you feel any better
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
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