Words i added to my t9 today: gnomes, facebook, and chlamydia.
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
he laminated a picture of his dick.
You realize at the bar last night we blew on imaginary whistles like rose from titanic right?
just woke up to a get well card i wrote myself when i was drunk. it was by the advil. i am a cocky bitch.
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize