i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
she woke me up with a blowjob, mickey mouse pancakes, a mugshot of my ex in county jail, and tequilla. Do you know if she fucked someone behind my back or did i win the vagina lottery?
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
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