Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
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