Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
got arrested for "breaking and entering" last night when i supposedly went into the wrong house made a sandwich and tried jerking off to porn on the tv...the cops told me they came in while my dick was out...oh and i missed work this morning and got fired
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
I'm waiting for your stupid pizza and this 400 lb drunk man is behind me singing the acapella version of Elevation by U2
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
