So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
True strength comes from lack of pants
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
You need to go! It’s a midwestern wedding - the single girls out there think life ends at 25 if they don’t have a picket fence and family. That’s when your penis introduces himself
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