he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
So my parents just watched me pour their rum into a bottle and only add crystal light powder, no water... Talk about being judged. All I could say was "Cortland tricks?"
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
My ass is underappreciated
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Randomize