ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
babies were throwing up all over the place
i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
His nipple licking is glorious
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