Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
As if I didn't already know that I was in the friend zone, our conversation that included the words "kiddo" and "old friend" really was a knee biter.
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
Someone broke into my car last night. Didn't take anything, even left the beer in my backseat. They need to get their priorities straight, obviously.
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
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