Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
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