U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
This girl just stopped in the middle of a sentence because of my blue eyes. She said she got lost in them. I am laying pipe tonight.
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
Randomize