Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
Divorce is final. Doing tequila shots at 1 in the afternoon.
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
What if for Halloween I paint my self gold and make sandwiches for everyone? I'd be a trophy wife! Get it?
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
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