Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
That Spanish guy who looks like Ben Affleck from that club we went to 3 weeks ago is still texting me.. He clearly doesn't remember what I look like.
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
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