I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
There is nothing wrong with watching parks and rec all day then getting blackout drunk by night
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
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