Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
birth control and beer are two of the most beautiful creations ever invented.
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If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
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Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
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