we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
I went golfing for the first time today!! Aren't you proud?
Driving a golf cart around all day with a keg attatched to the back doesn't exactly count as golfing
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
Randomize
