we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
My coke dealer called me at midnight just to ask how to spell a word. Not sure how I should feel about that.
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
Thanks for the drunken voicemail of bird calls. Love and miss you, too.
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
its as if im in a choose your own adventure book. except im not the reader and someone else is choosing my fate...one awesome decision at a time.
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
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