well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
I woke up covered in blue paint and my knee bleeding, when I went to return the shopping cart the guy in the elevator laughed hysterically. I'm having a good morning.
25 Odd Things These Pathetic People Do For Enjoyment
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
The Most Iconic Met Gala Looks The Kardashian’s Have Rocked
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.