"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
Hey welcome to Rick's drunk text tree. Rick is drunk right now please respond with "shut up" to remove your name from this list. Thanks for playing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
THEY NOW HAVE MIXED DRINK EMOJIS! LIFE IS GOOD! PRINCESSES DON'T DRINK BEER
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
It's a combination of amazing uncoordination, bad luck, and sheer determination to cause destruction wherever I go.
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