And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
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