just heard the best thing ever: calling people's kids "fuck trophies"
A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
areolas are like halos for boobs.
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
Randomize
