i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
You tried to get the stranger on the sea bus to give you a bite of his chicken sub by repeating over and over "im in a girl band"
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
I just found a To Do list on the table, written by me last night, that just says "1. Go downstairs. 2. Get Pickles. 3. Laptop"
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
That's good. So do you know why there is a giant pile of old tires in the laundry room and kitchen?
Well we knew you needed some tires, found someone on the way home who was giving them away and took them all. Has to be 4 in there you can use.
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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