yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
just woke up in my neighbors garage.
scratch that. I'm like 6 miles from my house in a random garage.
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
You spent an hour sitting naked in your neighbor's Jeep Wrangler yelling in a terrible British accent about how you were "on a safari". Then you passed out on your lawn.
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
Randomize