remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
Randomize
