Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
Why do I always have sex on the first date when I know it demotes me to booty call girl?
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
Randomize
