Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
Randomize