Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
I have this theory that your highest awareness of how drunk you are is while you're sitting on a toilet
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Randomize
