WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
DON'T LET IAN EAT HIS PEANUT BUTTER!!!
Just remembered that I poured a whole bottle of tylenol in there. It's chunky. It's deadly.
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
I'm your Election Erection Connection
I retroactively revoke all sex we've ever had.
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
“On a break” is implied when it’s a Russian chick dressed as Black Widow wearing Minnie Mouse ears
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