and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.
Farmville is her only friend.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
The struggles of a small town man whore
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize