Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
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Today might be the day that I legitimately throw up in my saxophone.
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
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I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.