My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
it's not cheating when I paid for it
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
You layed on my kitchen floor with a pile of m&ms at your crotch, said "your lightbulb don't match, is that one new?"
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
When a best friend shows up on a tricycle with a case a beer and goes "get on loser" you get on, because there is a magical adventure afoot
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
Randomize
