I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
That awkward moment when the guy you were hitting on at the bar last night is a possible suspect in a murder case.
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
Randomize
