The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
Randomize