What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
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Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
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How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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