You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So then I told him that only a restaurant managed by a florida fan could run out of ketchup
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
I wish drunk me wasn't so into manscaping. Or at least good at it. Either or really
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
It went from a "chill game of beer pong" to "absinthe body shots and a tits parade" in literally two minutes.
Told you inviting her was a good idea.
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize