doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
And you know what the worst part is? Because of him I can now relate to a goddamn Taylor Swift song. FUCK. MY. LIFE.
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
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